How often do you stop and think that YOU are the one in control of your pregnancy?
Of course, “control” doesn’t mean that you decide your own destiny. Sometimes freaky, unexpected things happen in life and in death, and we, as humans don’t have ultimate control with any of that.
But freak situations aside, there is so much in your pregnancy that you have control over.
I work with pregnant women that are choosing non-interventive midwifery care and planning to birth their baby at home.
This albeit small group of women is a group of very empowered, intelligent women. I assume that those who chose me as their midwife have chosen me, at least partly, because of my philosophy. I believe that a pregnant woman is fully responsible and capable of making all the decisions in the care of herself and her baby.
I hope and expect that my clients will come to me for advice, guidance, suggestions- my passion is walking on this path with women, before, during and after birth. But unlike some other care providers, I don’t “prescribe”, or insist or force anything. I do not want to be the pregnant lady police. I really, really believe that women can make their own choices once they are given enough information, and they can also teach themselves and learn from the choices they have made.
Every woman needs to be her own midwife.
So, if your midwife routinely hands out pregnancy tea to her clients, ask or find out why that might be beneficial to you. If you don’t like what you learn, then don’t drink it. It is your body. If your doctor prescribes you iron pills, do your research, learn about alternative ways to boost your iron. And if you don’t like what you learn, don’t take the iron pills.
Despite what you may have been taught, these are all your choices to make. My advice is not to take what anyone says or tells you as the ultimate truth. Do your own research, and tune into your own body and mind- deep, deep down. The answers for so many questions is in there, and the more connected your body, mind and spirit are, the less likely you are to do what anyone tells you.
Coming from a state where the practice of midwifery was (and is) illegal, I feel like I began my midwifery training very much focused on the ability of women to take control of themselves, and for that I am grateful. There was no “state protocol”, no pre-determined list of things to do routinely at every birth.
Many of the women whose births I was privileged to attend were truly their own midwives, even without realizing it. They had gone through their pregnancies making conscious choices, and by birth were just so connected to what their bodies and their babies were doing.
It is empowerment for all women- To ask a laboring woman after a contraction ,”How is your baby doing? -and to have her response be more informative, more accurate, more true than anything I could “monitor” with my high-tech gadgets. It is well-known in this world that “mama’s intuition” is the best indicator of fetal well-being. This seems so incredible, so crazy these days- but intuition was ours before anything else came along.
The wisdom we have as women is incredible. If we honor it, if we TRULY believe that we know best for bodies and our babies-then we will never be surprised by what we find. Connected to our souls, especially during birth, allows us as much control (and trust!) as we will ever have over the process.