The first time I did it I went to first base. The second time I did it I went all the way. That’s just me. Everyone is different and every base towards home matters. I do think we need to emphasize getting to home base, but let’s talk about the importance of the bases in between.
The first time I gave birth was in a hospital with an OB and medications. I call this first base. I did not have a horrible experience and didn’t know any better. This is the way many women in the modern world are choosing to have their babies. Let’s face it most of these women will have subsequent children this way and never give it more thought. They may not even know there are alternatives. I am not speaking of the wounded birthers who trip upon home birth and midwifery because of some emotional scarring left behind by a bad experience. I am talking to the “average Jane” who has no reason to seek out a better birthing experience.
Second base. What if instead of putting so much emphasis on home, we started singing the praises of second base. A hospital birth with a midwife with the possibility of some interventions. Not so “scary” as committing to a natural birth but a step towards the right direction. Perhaps if properly supported a few of these women could steal third base once they realize their true birthing power. I will never convince all of my clients or friends to get out of the hospital, but I may convince them to take a look at who is caring for them and how.
Third base. A natural birth in a hospital with a midwife or OB. This could very well happen by choice or accident. I am sure many women who were not intending to go this far do for many different reasons. This may also be as far as we can take it. As much education that there is on the safety of home birth, the hospital will always be looked upon as a safe haven. We need these women tell their stories. We may never get them to bring birth home, but they are going in the right direction for the team. They understand that birth is a natural process and somehow have left behind some of the fear. For some, this equals the glory of a home run.
I hit a home run. My second child was born at home with midwives and a doula. For me it was the ultimate achievement. It does not have the be the ultimate for all births. Second base can be as fulfilling to some as having a baby at home. Hitting a double or a triple is just as important for the next player as a home run. I wish every women could have the experience I had at home. I am also a realist and know this is not going to happen. Maybe if we didn’t focus so much on going all the way, we would have a more well rounded team in the end.
I would say my first time wasn’t even really first base…. It was a scheduled c-section with me under general anesthesia. I don’t regret it at all – I am still convinced it was 100% necessary, but still it was far far from ideal.
My second time was, in my definition, somewhere between second and third base – I was 100% natural in the hospital with an OB. I did have “interventions” in the form of a heplock and continuous monitoring (at least during the pushing phase – I arrived 10 CM).
Next time I am hoping for at least third base – 100% natural with no heplock and intermittent monitoring, but still in the hospital. Ideally I’d have a home birth, but it all depends on where we live and the providers. Sadly we can’t afford homebirth on our own, but we have military insurance and I know it covers homebirth with a CNM. If I can find a CNM willing to do a VBAC homebirth, I will get a home run. But if not, I will get the next best thing. 🙂
I love this idea. I’ve had a single, a triple, and I’m planning a homerun for April!
I love this article, Heather. I made it to first base with my first, and to third base with my second – but I would definitely say it equaled the glory of a home run. Lucky for me, my OB and hospital nurse were very supportive of a natural delivery, and did everything they could to help me achieve it. Like you, I wasn’t scarred by a horrible first birth experience – I just knew that things could be better the second time around 🙂
What right do yo have to judge other women this way? Giving birth in a hospital isn’t “first base”. If this is how a woman wants to give birth she should, without you judgmental childbirth nazi’s talking about it this way. Disgusting.