We often learn, as we are finding our power, how to say NO. “No” is so valuable and an essential skill that many of us need to practice. We are so used to saying yes that it can feel new and exciting and scary to say NO! No, I won’t wear that mask. No, I do not want that test. No, I would like to decline.
After moving through the no phase (my mentor Donna Maria says enjoy it! It’s like being a toddler!) we move onto being able to say YES to things in a new and powerful way. Not by mistake, or I kinda mean it, but a hell YES this is what I want!
In birth this takes on an entirely different flavor when you are sitting with women that say YES. It is no longer “I don’t want to have another c-section” but HELL YES I WILL have a vaginal birth! It’s not “I don’t want anyone telling me what to do” YES I WILL BE AUTONOMOUS! The energy is so different and so palpable.
One of the main focuses we encourage with women we serve is figuring out WHAT DO YOU WANT! So much easier to say what’s NOT working (it’s super normal to have a “negativity bias”) but it’s TRUE POWER to end the obsession with that and focus in on what is desired.
This is one of my main “tests” of someone’s dedication to their birth vision.
What are you saying yes to for your birth? If you’re a birth worker, how do you see this play out in your practice? Tell me about it in the comments!