The value of a midwife or doula is in the relationship.

Not in the results of a client’s birth experience.

Let’s sit with that.

RELATIONSHIP vs. OUTCOME.

What I offer, what you offer, is YOU.

There is no guarantee of anything other than I will show up, authentically.

If we are midwives or doulas, the “business” is our life force in the form of physical presence and guided spiritual support.

When I feel into the deep and transformative work and messages I am offering to the world, I notice the expansion in my body. My womb space, even. There is a knowing that the message needs to be out there, yet I don’t control who needs it or wants it.

My wisdom as a midwife is unique to me, as yours is to you.

So why do we shortchange our own brilliance?

I’m talking about discounts and sales.

This includes barters, trades and whatever else people think they NEED to do XYZ….whether that’s hire you, or buy your course.

What I offer is not for everyone.

What I offer OR create is not just a way to make money. It is LITERALLY my life vital energy being put into a package, as a midwife or in relationship with Margo in offering our school or doula program.

Truly priceless.

These are services that don’t feel right to me to discount or to cheapen, or position as if they are one of many on a shelf at Walmart.

To quote my teacher Luis Mojica, when people visited or summoned a healer to witness or serve in their own transformational process, the person had to make a sacrifice.

Note: the healer (midwife) was sought after for their expertise and wisdom; not because they could or would ensure the “success” of the initiation. It’s well-known in every other context that initiation involves risk; and that no one person can complete an initiation for another. Guidance and wisdom were what was promised; not that one would necessarily make it out alive. This risk was/is accepted in other initiatory processes.

Maybe it was hiking across the desert. Maybe it was climbing a mountain. Looking at fairy tales, maybe it was a first born child.

As IBMS student/wisdom keeper Andrea shared today…”at every gate (threshold) there is a toll.” 🙌💖. (LOVED THIS!!)

Whatever it was, it was valued and understood to be important to make this sacrifice if you did indeed want the support or guidance you said you did.

Nowadays, money (for better or worse) IS the “sacrifice” and there’s a way to feel that exchange in our bodies.

Feel in your body that special gift you offer the world. The gift that only you can offer. Only. You.

How does it feel to “discount” that or offer a deal?

For me, it feels unstable. It feels shaky and uncertain, as if I am still not quite sure I am worth it. It puts the power in the hands of the one who needs the thing, rather than in the wisdom of the one who is being sought.

As for what you should do in your own practice/business, there is no one size fits all answer.

After years of offering discounts and sales we have decided to no longer do so. Unless one day that feels right again.

In holding our own value and self worth, we encourage you to do the same.

In holding our programs and offerings as gems that you can’t find anywhere else, we show you how to do that, too.

There will always be people that are right and people that aren’t for the work that we do.

Sticking to the feelings of abundance and expansion that come as we navigate these topics for ourselves is where the wisdom lives.

What comes up for you in your body as you feel into offering YOU as the most valuable “service”?

PS I am endless with the topic ideas that may arise in my next Beyond the Mind for Birthworkers group. You won’t find this kind of program (somatics + birth +my experience) anywhere else. Just saying.:)

Oxoxo
Maryn