Have you ever been envious of someone? Envious of someone’s success, confidence, intelligence? I am sure we all have at some point. A strange thing has happened to me lately. I have birth envy. Not the kind of birth envy that comes about because my own birth lacked something. I envy women in labour.
Imagine what a different world we would live in if we thought about women in labour as lucky. If the experience of birth was looked upon like winning some cosmic lottery. Sure women are considered lucky because they are able to conceive and birth their own babies. I am not talking about the prize at the end of it all, I am talking about “during” being a prize.
Watching my last client in early labour made me conscious of this feeling. Her contractions were intense but she was quite clear and laughing in between them. Free of fear and full of great conversation. I wanted it. I wanted to feel that again, pain and all.
Instead of being greeted with clinical “what ifs” and “just in cases”, imagine labour being piped in with fanfare and grace. Labour is hard work, and it must be taken seriously. It can also be beautiful and fulfilling. My wish for all first time mothers would be to only hear stories of triumph. Let us lessen the horror and war stories. Yes, we must educate ourselves on all of the possibilities. Educating, is different than being bombarded with the dogma of bad birth.
I have had to analyze my want for another child. Is it because I have birth envy? I know now it is not. Until my time, I will live through my clients, hopefully standing by while they relish in their births. Every experience may or may not be what they expected, but it is theirs.
Positive support and viewing labour as the prize may lead to an amazing experience…..don’t be jealous!